EGO: THE SCOUNDREL OR THE SAVIOR

“You can very well go to hell, mister!” Something that often crosses my mind these days, but seldom does one speak out such things. You ask why? Well, isn’t it frowned upon?  We are supposed to be soft spoken, well behaved beings that do not so much as swear in the solitude of their minds when offended. Is that one of the reasons why egoistic people often find themselves under the scanner? I cannot possibly remember how many times I have been told by people to let go of my ego and be the ‘bigger person’. So basically I would have more friends and lead a happier life if I was a less egoistic person?

Well, they might not be wrong. I cannot remember the myriad times I ended up hurting the people I care about and sometimes even losing them because apparently being the bigger person was not my ego’s cup of tea. And that’s not all. It won’t let me back out from an argument because not only can I not change my opinions, everyone else must also be on the same page as me. Every so often I find myself pondering if I am too great a person to be bothered by others outlook of me.

Sigh. But then is it possible that I am mistaken and that my ego is not the scamp I have condemned it to be?

Flashback: Not long back I used to like this guy who decided to leave for his own ‘reasons’. Was I hurt? Yes. Did I keep begging him to come back till even our politicians seemed to have more self esteem than me? NO. Reason: My dear misjudged ego. While the world and my beloved heart kept asking to plead, my ego told me I was better off without him and simply because one person didn’t think I was good enough, it DOES NOT define who I am. Okay before you decide to scrutinize my words all too well, I am not saying pleading is a bad thing. Also, don’t let it give you the idea that it makes me heartless. It simply gives me enough strength to let go of things I need to.

‘Show me someone without an ego and I will show you a loser.’- Donald J. Trump

“If being an egomaniac means I believe in what I do and in my art or music, then in that respect you can call me that... I believe in what I do, and I'll say it.” 
― John Lennon

Having an ego for the right reasons isn’t bad. An individual without an ego is perhaps someone who is at ease being a spectator or someone who would always be content taking home the consolation prize. Our ego is that thing that keeps us going when we decide to quit, that which helps us go beyond our comfort zone and come up with solutions that our otherwise naive minds would be unable to procure. Being proud of who we are or what we have accomplished is not called being egoistical. Again ego doesn’t preach bragging. One needs to be humble because no one is a know-it-all not to mention no one likes one. But when it comes to your area of expertise show them who’s the boss....like a boss.

All in all the same ego that often refrains me from saying the magical words saves me from a lot of embarrassment and heartbreak.  Our egos are fortunately or unfortunately a part of our identity.

So returning to my dilemma, should I let go of my ego?